Merry Christmas!

Family photo at Elli's school party

Elli makes a "gingerbread house" with Dad

Making Christmas cupcakes.
(We finally got to the holiday baking on Christmas Eve when
Scott had a day off. I find it's too big a job to tackle alone.)

Licking batter is the best part!
This photo makes me laugh every time I look at it.


Building our gingerbread house
(I managed this project on my own last week.)

A "Cool" Guitar

This morning at breakfast, Big Boy started playing air guitar on Little Boy's favorite little stuffed puppy. He told us that he wants a really cool guitar so he can play his really cool guitar song. He belted out, in a great rock'n'roll gravelly voice, a line from the Credence Clearwater Revival song "Fortunate Son," and told us that you have to sing really loud so people can hear you. (Where is he picking all this up?)

We told him that we'd love for him to learn guitar, and Scott offered to let him borrow Scott's guitar.

Big Boy looked at him and carefully (especially for a 5-year-old) said, "Dad, I want to play a cool guitar. Little Girl could play yours though."

Scott feigned shock and hurt while, out of eye-shot, I stifled my laughter.

We asked what would make a guitar cool, and Big Boy said he wanted his guitar to have sticker letters that read, "___'s Cool Guitar." That would make it pretty unmistakable, wouldn't it?

Christmas Program

Anna was an angel. All the little girls wanted to hold the doll playing Baby Jesus, but fortunately they managed to share during the actual performance when an angel grabbed the baby from Mary!

Sam decided back in September that he wanted to be a donkey. Then, he woke up from his nap this day out of sorts and told me he didn't like the donkey ears, they looked like rat ears, and he wanted to be a shepherd now! I showed him pictures of donkeys and their ears and told him that his choice was to be a donkey or to sit with Gramma and Grampa. He came around after a few more minutes! (I'm rather proud of my donkey ears actually -- it was a rather miraculous to find gray foam in my house in just enough quantity to make two ears, and they stood up beautifully.)

Joseph, the sheep, and the donkey are supposed to be doing hand motions with the song "Away in a Manger" but all three boys must have agreed earlier that this was not a good idea. They sang, but remained in character.

Fired

For the first time in my life, I've fired someone. Actually, a group of someones.

My daughter has been seen by a multi-disciplinary team at our local pediatric hospital for several years. This team focuses on children with digestive, sleep, and related disorders. It's a great idea, because they bring together doctors from GI (gastroenterology) and ENT (ears, nose, throat), pulmonary specialists, nutritionists, and psychologists, along with nurses and nurse practitioners. Instead of making multiple appointments to see each specialty, you make one appointment and see everyone. They look at a problem from multiple perspectives, which yields a more thorough and accurate diagnosis and treatment plan.

However, I've always been a bit frustrated by the way this team runs. It's almost impossible to get someone to answer the team phone. That wouldn't be a big deal if they returned calls. But this has been a chronic problem for me. I leave messages over and over and no-one calls back. Not good when you're talking about weight loss, inhaling water and milk when drinking, struggling with G-tube feedings, and more! They also don't have an on-call person designated to handle emergencies. All you get is voicemail.

I also hate to go to clinic visits there. The clinic always runs behind, and they haven't been good about letting us know when things are being delayed. I heard through the grapevine that they actually have trouble getting staff to report to clinic on time. This is unbelievably inconsiderate of us families, who drag siblings and fragile children in to that hospital from who-knows-how-far away and have to be there on time. One time I sat in a room at the far end of the hall for an hour and 15 minutes without seeing one person. No-one bothered to let me know why the delay or to see if I needed anything. I honestly thought they had forgotten I was there!

(Don't get me wrong -- individually, each person on this team is great. They know their stuff and they have helped us out... once I got them on the phone or actually spoke to them in person. But the team as a whole somehow does not work well together or for my family.)

This last week, I ended up having a visit to cardiology assigned to me for my son. They picked the same day and time that I was supposed to take Elli to see this team. I immediately called and left a message asking to reschedule.

It has been 4 business days and no-one has returned my call. I called today, and again got voicemail. I don't know what happens to my messages, but it feels like they disappear into a black hole!

I decided that I can't keep doing this. I know enough specialists and I know them well enough now that I think we can manage Elli's issues without this team. I need to work with people who return phone calls promptly and know how to run a clinic, especially with 4 kids and 2 with many appointments, medications, and tests to keep track of.

So I fired them. I sent an email to the business director of the clinic explaining the problems I have had with them and that I am withdrawing my child from the program. I figured that the loss of revenue is the best way to get through to them how serious this is. After all, how many people fire their doctors? I also called the team voicemail again and left a message saying that I needed to cancel the appointment next month and that I don't need to reschedule because I won't be coming back.

Receiving Grace

Grace is a foreign concept to humans. Our knee-jerk reaction to receiving a gift is to feel indebted to the giver and attempt to even things out, or pay them back in some other way.

I admit to feeling this way too. God has put me into a situation in life in which I've had no choice but to receive gifts of others' time, food, care of my children, care of my home, financial assistance, and more. It has been one of the most difficult things I've faced. By nature I'm fiercely independent. I want to do it all and I want to do it my way. So when I have to accept help, I naturally want to try to pay it back, so as not to feel quite so helpless and indebted to those who have graciously given of themselves. I am certain that this trait is something God is working very hard to purge from my character!

I read a blog written by Tim Challies, Informing the Reforming: A Reformed Christian Blog. He wrote recently about an experience with his son that brought home to him this reality about humans and receiving grace. It's a beautiful story, but it also was a very clear picture of how grace is supposed to work in God's relationship with us.

I realized that the best response to receiving grace is twofold: extend grace to others (which means forgiving, overlooking, and not seeking to exact compensation for wrongs done whether accidental or intended), and enjoy and rejoice in the grace I've been given, both directly from God and through His vessels, without thought of try to pay it back to the giver.

Don't Stop Running!

...or you'll get hopelessly behind!

Last week is a case in point. I think I only had one day with nothing on the calendar! I spent half the day Wednesday at Children's and at a meeting at Elli's school, took all 4 kids to the dentist Thursday (only 2 of them had appointments, but everyone has to go!) followed by 6 hours working at Children's that afternoon (not counting the 1 1/2 hours commuting), and then headed to Children's a third straight day for Luke's heart catheterization. We had to arrive at 6am, and didn't leave until 6:30pm.

This weekend we got an unexpected chance to catch our breaths and survey the damage. A winter storm blew in and canceled our Saturday plans. I wanted to cheer, but I was too exhausted to rejoice any other way than by crashing immediately following lunch!

After three days pretty much absent from the home, I have at least 10 loads of laundry to wash.

The carpets haven't been vacuumed in over a week, except the dining room which got a once-over Wednesday before company came over for dinner.

No Christmas presents had been wrapped except those for a family we adopted at work that had to be delivered Wednesday. In fact, the Christmas shopping was only about half done.

I'd tried to grocery-shop at Walmart on Tuesday, but I forgot my grocery list and thus forgot half the things I needed. So the food supplies in the house were rather sketchy (for example, I had everything for spaghetti except the pasta, hot dogs but no buns, etc.).

The kids hadn't been made to properly clean up their rooms, so toys were strewn from one end of the house to the other, plus down the stairs into the basement.

Many of my things had been relocated as well: I found pieces of my Nativity Scene crammed into a Diego "Rescue Pack."

The EOBs (explanation of benefits -- document showing how much medical insurance was billed, will pay, and leaves for us to pay) and hospital statements were out of control again. (Have I mentioned how much I hate paper? It is my nemesis. I never know what to keep, what to shred, and what to recycle and Get Out Of My House!)

I still needed to work 1 1/2 hours to get my 10 per week in... but I ran out of time and energy and didn't make it.

I also needed to get a bunch of things ready for our Christmas program tonight at church (one donkey costume, 4 angel costumes, and a Mary costume), Elli's holiday party at school on Friday (craft supplies for 25 kids plus an unknown number of siblings), and finish the Christmas cards. I'm about ready to bail on the annual Christmas letter for the first time in 9 years. I lost my address list from last year, so I've got a significant stack of recipients for whom I lack a complete address.

I'm trying really hard not to be paralyzed by my fatigue and the overwhelmingness of it all. That's what usually happens. The job looks too big (especially those piles of paper), so I just leave it and go do something more accomplishable. Or more pleasant. I have to find the right balance between getting sleep (which means accomplishing Absolutely Nothing on the list but hopefully improving my attitude, mood, and efficiency later) and working on stuff (which means choosing one thing and therefor also choosing to not do everything else) til I'm staggering around and biting everyone's heads off I'm so tired.

This morning I was able to make a dent in it. I know it's Sunday, but I had to stay home with a sick child and decided that I needed to bless my family with clean clothes. So I sorted my ten loads of laundry, started into them (I only have 2 loads done, but it's better than nothing), and worked on the costumes for tonight. I am pretty sure I will be home more this week, so I'm praying for good health and energy to get it all done.

P.S. The news from Luke's heart cath was good. Very good, in fact. His heart surgery 6 weeks ago did what they hoped, and they finally got all the pictures they needed. His situation is much more simple than they feared, so he should only need one more surgery... and it will be fairly soon. I'm so thankful that he will not remember any of this. And I'm very thankful that God chose to bless him with a much easier problem to solve than his older sister's.

Remembering the Christ of Christmas

Every year, it gets tougher to keep the kids thinking at least a little about the advent of Christ. The kids are old enough now to be totally fixated on presents. So this year, we started a new tradition (ideas borrowed from my friend Dea and from my parents). We have two Christmas trees, one in the living room with our Nativity set, and one in the family room, near the fireplace and stockings.


The one in the living room we call our Baby Jesus tree. Sam willingly surrendered his little "Charlie Brown Christmas tree" from last year for this purpose. It's just a little 18-inch artificial tree, but it's just right for this first year. We have hung all the ornaments we have that relate to Christ's birth on it, which isn't many... so far.


I'm keeping my eye out for good ornaments for it, and hope to get a slightly larger tree (maybe 3 or 4 feet tall) -- if the finances allow-- after Christmas when they are all marked down.

Ornaments about the first Christmas are tough to find, so I'm going to borrow my parents' idea of buying solid color balls and writing with permanent marker the names given to Jesus and what He gave us that first Christmas. (e.g. salvation, Prince of Peace, Emmanuel). Then every year, when we hang them up, we will read them and talk about them. (We haven't done this yet -- I can't decide if I want to write on the balls I already have, which are a bit large for a little tree, or buy some new littler ones for this special tree.)


Our large tree in the family room features our special family ornaments -- mementos from trips, the kids' special ornaments (baby's 1st Christmas, etc), photo ornaments (one of my favorite kinds), and the ones we bought the first year we were married. It is full of memories of our family and is very special.


On the same table as the Baby Jesus tree, we set up the Nativity scene. It's a ceramic one we were given as a wedding gift. The kids love playing with it, so I'm looking for a tougher one that can withstand their loving attention. (I'd like one with Jesus separate from the manger so we can put him in on Christmas morning.) I found a very simple one at a gift shop near us, but it was a bit more than I was prepared to spend without spousal approval!

Last year we bought an Advent book with pieces that pop out each day of December. We read the story of Jesus' birth and add a figure to the scene every night at bedtime. By the end of December last year, Sam had the whole story memorized! This year, I've put some of Luke 2 on Elli's Dynavox so she can tell parts of the story too. She really likes this, and it pleases me that she goes to public school and shares the Bible with her classmates and teachers. (They can't stop her from saying what she wants to say, after all!)

So how are you remembering Jesus' birth with your family?

Watch the index finger

I've had these pictures for almost a year now, but they got lost in the flurry of pregnancy/new baby/weird medical issues activity of this year. This week I've been organizing all my digital photography to get it ready for albums and found these treasures.

As I was cracking up at the facial expressions, a little voice in my ear whispered "Watch Anna's index finger!"

Any guesses as to the theme here?

I see a bike helmet, ball cap, sock puppets, Thomas blanket,
puppy, tea set, and matching little-kid chairs.

"Watch this silly face, Daddy!"

Oh. My.
This is how the entire family gets sick, folks.

Facing the Giants: Movie Review

A friend recently loaned us the movie Facing the Giants, which we watched last weekend. We both expected a family-friendly Hollywood-made film about football.

What we found was a Christian movie produced by a church. If I had know this at the beginning, I doubt I would have watched it at all. I've seen one too many saccharine-sweet, poorly acted, poorly produced Christian movies and typically choose not to view them.

That being said, this movie was pleasantly surprising. While it was not up to Hollywood production or acting standards, it was much better than I expected. It told the story well, didn't sugar-coat the main characters' lives, and challenged viewers to look up from their life's circumstances to find the bigger picture.

I took issue with two elements of the movie. First, at one point, a friend approaches the main character, who is overwhelmed and deeply discouraged about the sudden flood of insurmountable obstacles in his life. In a conversation about God's promises, the main character explains that he has been bringing his problems to God. The friend tells this story:
"Two farmers facing drought prayed to God for rain. One prayed and then went about his day. The other prayed and then went out and prepared his fields for rain. Which one believed God would answer?"

The obvious answer is the one who prepared his fields for rain.

My problem with this is that the story assumes that God always works by giving us exactly what we ask for. Maybe what those farmers needed was not rain to water their fields but a push out of their comfort zone to a new area desperately in need of godly farmers! Maybe they needed to leave farming altogether and do something else. God is God and He knows what He is doing, whether we understand it or not. And just like a parent whose child asks for a snack when the parent is preparing their favorite meal for dinner, God knows when "no" is the best answer to a given request.

My other issue with the movie was the ending. I knew how it was going to end as soon as the story revealed all the major challenges for its characters. They wrapped it all up in a nice neat package and put a bow on top. That isn't real life for anyone, and it certainly isn't real life for God's people either... not in this life.

The Bible doesn't promise an easy life or a happy ending for us here on earth. It promises that we will suffer in this life. It promises that God will wipe away every tear in the next life if we are faithful to Him and glorify Him despite and through everything He allows us to experience here.

I would have liked to see the movie leave the character continuing to praise God and trust Him even though many of his problems remained unresolved. To me, seeing faithful Christians enduring sorrow, pain, and persecution with unshakable confidence and joy in their God is so much more encouraging and inspiring. It challenges me to rise above my own difficult circumstances, yank my gaze from my life to my God, and continue to praise Him no matter how little sleep I've gotten, how sick the kids are, how drastically my plans are changed by unexpected news, or what just broke.

For some thought-provoking reading on movies, Christians, and Christian movies, consider the ongoing series "Godless Hollywood?" by Tom Neven on Boundless Line. (Part 2 is here, and Part 3 is here.)

First Snow of the Season

Even all bundled up, it was just a bit too cold and breezy for Luke.

This was a quick photo snapped from the front porch
before I took him back inside.

This is the kids' first snowman ever!
They can hardly wait for more snow to build another one.

Anna kept taking off her mittens
(or "glubs" as they both called them)
and then complaining how cold her hands were.
Silly girl!

Sam enjoyed brushing snow off everything.
This was his incredulous face when I told him
I wanted the snow on everything!

After the kids got too cold to play anymore, we went inside and made hot chocolate. (I should have made the hot chocolate first, then they could have run off the sugar high outside!)

I don't have pictures of Elli because she didn't even get a snow delay that day. :(

A Biblical Model of Parenting

I wrote a little bit about my approach to raising kids yesterday. I was asked a question that I thought I'd respond to today.

When we were expecting our first child, we attended a parenting conference that completely transformed the way we approached raising our kids. Most of what I'm sharing today comes from the speakers of that conference and the book they wrote on biblical childrearing.

They spent quite a bit of time discussing what the Bible says about human nature, children, parenting, etc. I pulled 6 key points out of this:

1. Your children are the product of two things: shaping influence (their physical makeup and their life experience) and Godward orientation (whether they love or reject God determines how they interact with their experiences). Parenting involves (1) providing the best shaping influences you can and (2) the careful shepherding of your children's responses to those influences.


2. The heart determines behavior.

   Mark 7:21 "...from within, out of men's hearts, come evil thoughts, sexual immorality, theft, murder, adultery, greed, malice, deceit, lewdness, envy, slander, arrogance and folly."

   Luke 6:45 "The good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and the evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. For out of the overflow of his heart, his mouth speaks."

   We must learn to see our kids' behavior as more than just undesirable actions or annoyances. We have to work backward from behavior to the heart. Don't focus only on behavior. By talking with our children about what they did, we work to expose their heart struggles - why they did it. Help your children see that they were made for a relationship with God. The thirst of the heart can be satisfied in truly knowing God. (And something else I've learned? When I respond incorrectly to their poor behavior, I have my own heart issues to confront and probably sins to confess to them too!)
   
   
3. You have authority because God has made you His agent. This means you are on His errand, not yours. Your task is to help your children know God and the true nature of reality. Ephesians 6:4 commands you to bring your children up in the training and instruction of the Lord. This is a command to provide the training and instruction of the Lord; to function on God's behalf. You and your child are both under God's authority. You have different roles but the same Master. And your correction should orbit around God as the one offended, not you. This will keep your focus on restoration, moving a child who has disobeyed God back to the path of obedience.
   


4. Since the chief end of man is to glorify God and enjoy Him forever, you must set such a worldview before your children. You must help them learn that only in Him will they find themselves.


5. If you have these Biblical goals, you can only accomplish them through biblical methods. You must reject the substitute methods that our culture presents.


6. God has given two methods for childrearing. They are (1) communication and (2) the rod. These methods must be woven together in your practice. Your children need to be known and understood. Thus, rich communication is necessary. They also need authority and firmness. Thus, the rod is necessary. The rod functions to underscore the importance of the things you talk with them about.*

In the stage of development from infancy through about age 5, the primary characteristic is change. They grow more than at any other stage, develop a vast array of new skills, and present us with a steady stream of new challenges. In all of this, it's easy for us parents to lose focus. We need a single over-arching focus, "narrow enough to give firm direction in concrete situations and broad enough to encompass the changing world of the young child."*

The most important lesson for a child to learn in this period is that he is an individual under authority. He has been made by God and has a responsibility to obey God in all things. The key passage of Scripture for this period is

"Children, obey your parents in the Lord for this is right. 'Honor your father and mother,' which is the first commandment with a promise: 'that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth.'" Ephesians 6:1-3

Obedience is a response to God. Children will not submit to you or any other earthly authority unless they understand that they are made for God. He has the right to rule them. If they don't see this, they won't see living to glorify God. They will be self-absorbed and worship only themselves. Submitting to earthly authorities is part of being under God's authority because He has designated those earthly authorities over us.

Acquaint your children with authority and submission when they are infants. This training starts the day you bring them home from the hospital. These lessons, firmly established in the early years, will yield fruit throughout childhood. Establish these principles and you will eliminate the need to have repeated contests over authority.

We model authority and submission, not by submitting to our children (God made us their authorities, not vice versa), but by submitting to our earthly authorities. Wives, model for your children the type of attitude and behavior you want from them by submitting to and honoring your husbands, supervisors if you work outside the home, and other authorities in your life. Husbands, model this attitude in the way you submit to... and talk about... your boss, the government and its agents (e.g. police, internal revenue service, president), etc.

That's a tremendously high calling, isn't it? I have so far to go. I've been rereading this book lately and been convicted in so many areas. My example to my kids has been lacking, and my goals with them have fallen short. But the good news is that with God and for His own, it is never too late and all things are possible.

*All quotes taken from Shepherding a Child's Heart by Tedd Tripp. Conference material presented by Paul and Tedd Tripp in 2000. I highly recommend this book. It is one I read every year, not just to remind me of how I should be approaching my children, but also to remind me how I should approach my own sinful heart. It is immensely practical for self-correction as well as for bringing up children.

Thanksgiving Resolutions

This year, I decided that making a New Year's resolution to get in better shape was too little too late. So I made Thanksgiving resolutions to get back to the gym and not gain any weight through the holiday season.

Then Luke started waking me up 2-3 times a night. Needless to say, I didn't get to the gym those days!

Last week, my pediatrician told me that Luke is fully recovered from surgery and needs to learn to sleep through the night again. Most babies that end up in the hospital regress in the sleep department (hospitals don't cater to those who wish to have no interruptions in the night), and then parents have a very difficult time distinguishing between genuine needs and manipulation when they all get back home. At first, the little guy needed pain meds and food because he was healing. But at some point, those needs fade away, leaving the baby in an unhealthy sleep pattern.

So the doctor said to start working with him to go longer between feedings at night. I realized that if he would sleep longer, not only would his daytime routine settle back down, but I would get enough rest to get up early and go to the gym.

I also passionately believe that a parent's primary task is to teach their children that life does not revolve around the child. Each of us must learn this in order to function, let alone succeed, in the world. I do my children a huge disservice if I do not prepare them for this reality. But this requires daily and doggedly-determined work by us parents. People are born self-centered and self-focused. If you look for it, you see this even in little babies (this is why they cry when you don't do what they want you to!). If I want my children to grow up into responsible, considerate, generous, loving adults who work well with others, I must teach them this. It doesn't come naturally. And learning to wait without complaining, help others instead of indulge yourself, consider the needs of everyone when making choices -- all are crucial skills that take years and years to develop and mature. The longer you as a parent wait to start, the longer your kids have to develop selfish habits and the harder it is to break those bad-but-firmly-ingrained patterns.

It may seem trivial, but you start teaching an others-focus in infancy when you teach your baby good habits and refuse to cater to their every whim (such as eating at 2am or being held every moment). Crying never hurt anyone -- in fact, it's healthy for a child to experience not getting their way. Of course they'll be upset about it. But the next time, it won't be so unexpected. And when they mature enough to start working on the concept of "Do all things without grumbling or complaining" (Philippians 2:14), they will already know that life doesn't always go their way and will be ready to for this next step.

Whew. I got off on a major tangent! I have such a hard time watching parents passively watch their children misbehave and do nothing about it. We have neighbors who, when their 4-year-old daughter runs around the neighborhood without a shirt on, just laugh and say she just won't put clothes on. Excuse me, but isn't it your job to teach her these things, and to make her do it even if she doesn't want to???? That's what it means to be a parent! When are you planning to teach her about modesty? And if you don't establish authority now, do you honestly think she'll listen to you later when the issues are much more important?

Ok, Ok. Back to the topic at hand.

I made a third resolution: Get Luke sleeping through the night again.

Friday night, I girded up my loins to endure an angry baby. I was determined to wait until 4am to feed him. That was the latest he'd gone on his own that week, so I knew he could do it.

At 2am, he let loose. He was ticked off and no pacifier was going to satisfy him -- trust me, I tried! I patted his bottom, held the pacifier in his mouth, spoke soothingly to him... everything but pick him up. I nearly drifted off standing up, so I finally crawled back into bed, seeing that he didn't care what I did if it didn't involve food.

After about half an hour of this 4-month-old version of a temper-trantrum, I moved him to the pack'n'play at the far end of the house. The two boys share a room and I couldn't put Sam through any more of it.

Of course, being picked up and then put back down without a feeding in between was The Last Straw. But he was tired, and after a short flash of temper and about 15 more minutes of gradually quieter grumbling, he settled down and drifted off to sleep.

He woke up at 3:45am, so I staggered out, fed him just a few minutes early, and put him back to sleep in the boys' room.

Saturday night, I wasn't sure what to expect. Imagine the glorious bliss when I woke up to his cries at 6am! The boy catches on fast, praise God! He has slept til at least 4am every night since, everyone is sleeping better without his crying every 2 hours at night, and I actually made it to the gym yesterday.

Third resolution - check

Now I just have to re-acclimate my body to exercise. I walked the track rather than the treadmill yesterday, and even jogged for about 3/4 of a mile. Miraculously, I was actually able to get out of bed this morning. Every muscle from my waist down aches, right down to my toes, but it's a good ache. And after just one workout, I feel a lot better about everything -- my health, my eating (it's weird, but as soon as I start exercising, junk food loses its appeal!), and my ability to take care of the kids... especially Elli. Scott and I realized awhile ago that we have no choice: we MUST stay in shape if we are going to avoid injuring ourselves lifting and transferring Elli.

My dream is to be fit enough to take the kids out for a run on nice days. We bought a jogging stroller for Elli and bikes for Sam and Anna for Christmas (shhhh.... don't tell!). I'll have to have some endurance to keep up with the kids on bikes! I'm really looking forward to getting outside with them, and I think Elli will absolutely LOVE getting out of her wheelchair and racing with her siblings.

First and second resolutions: in process

Questions, questions, questions

I have found myself asking the strangest questions of myself lately. Questions I couldn't even have conceived of before becoming a mother.

Have you ever asked yourself:

What is the fascination with hand-washing? I am convinced that my daughter goes potty 15 times a day just to have an excuse to wash her hands.

Why do kids always have to go potty during mealtimes? Is there something about eating that triggers bladder spasms or do they get bored and know this is a sure-fire way to get down from the table for a few minutes?

Why do kids ask questions they already know the answer to (like "What are you doing? when you do something you do every day or "What is that?" when you're holding something they've seen since infancy... like a towel)?

Why is it that, no matter how far ahead of time I start, it always takes longer than the time I allowed myself to get everyone out the door? This morning I started 20 minutes before I had to leave, and I was still frantically racing around at the last minute, frustrated with the kids who were moving slower than their normal slow pace and resisting going into the cold garage to get shoes and coats and not wanting to let the door close behind them while they were in there and then grabbing light jackets when the windchill today is in the teens...

Why can't I accept the reality that my Christmas tree and nativity scenes are dynamic pieces, changing moment-by-moment at the hands of my very excited children? (I find myself getting really annoyed when I find my carefully-placed decorations moved. I need to just get over it, but I want to be the decorator in my house and I keep being usurped!)

Why won't kids eat the crust of bread? I never left the crusts of my sandwiches like this! (Or did I, mom?) There's good eating left on that plate (and I don't mean the grapes either)!

(Once upon a time, I sold Pampered Chef, and I got a "cut'n'seal" as part of my starter kit. It's a tool that makes a round pocket out of a sandwich. They told me that parents and kids would love it because it cut all the crusts off and fits neatly in small hands.

I thought it was a waste of perfectly good bread.

Now I understand.)