This year, I decided that making a New Year's resolution to get in better shape was too little too late. So I made Thanksgiving resolutions to get back to the gym and not gain any weight through the holiday season.
Then Luke started waking me up 2-3 times a night. Needless to say, I didn't get to the gym those days!
Last week, my pediatrician told me that Luke is fully recovered from surgery and needs to learn to sleep through the night again. Most babies that end up in the hospital regress in the sleep department (hospitals don't cater to those who wish to have no interruptions in the night), and then parents have a very difficult time distinguishing between genuine needs and manipulation when they all get back home. At first, the little guy needed pain meds and food because he was healing. But at some point, those needs fade away, leaving the baby in an unhealthy sleep pattern.
So the doctor said to start working with him to go longer between feedings at night. I realized that if he would sleep longer, not only would his daytime routine settle back down, but I would get enough rest to get up early and go to the gym.
I also passionately believe that a parent's primary task is to teach their children that life does not revolve around the child. Each of us must learn this in order to function, let alone succeed, in the world. I do my children a huge disservice if I do not prepare them for this reality. But this requires daily and doggedly-determined work by us parents. People are born self-centered and self-focused. If you look for it, you see this even in little babies (this is why they cry when you don't do what they want you to!). If I want my children to grow up into responsible, considerate, generous, loving adults who work well with others, I must teach them this. It doesn't come naturally. And learning to wait without complaining, help others instead of indulge yourself, consider the needs of everyone when making choices -- all are crucial skills that take years and years to develop and mature. The longer you as a parent wait to start, the longer your kids have to develop selfish habits and the harder it is to break those bad-but-firmly-ingrained patterns.
It may seem trivial, but you start teaching an others-focus in infancy when you teach your baby good habits and refuse to cater to their every whim (such as eating at 2am or being held every moment). Crying never hurt anyone -- in fact, it's healthy for a child to experience not getting their way. Of course they'll be upset about it. But the next time, it won't be so unexpected. And when they mature enough to start working on the concept of "Do all things without grumbling or complaining" (Philippians 2:14), they will already know that life doesn't always go their way and will be ready to for this next step.
Whew. I got off on a major tangent! I have such a hard time watching parents passively watch their children misbehave and do nothing about it. We have neighbors who, when their 4-year-old daughter runs around the neighborhood without a shirt on, just laugh and say she just won't put clothes on. Excuse me, but isn't it your job to teach her these things, and to make her do it even if she doesn't want to???? That's what it means to be a parent! When are you planning to teach her about modesty? And if you don't establish authority now, do you honestly think she'll listen to you later when the issues are much more important?
Ok, Ok. Back to the topic at hand.
I made a third resolution: Get Luke sleeping through the night again.
Friday night, I girded up my loins to endure an angry baby. I was determined to wait until 4am to feed him. That was the latest he'd gone on his own that week, so I knew he could do it.
At 2am, he let loose. He was ticked off and no pacifier was going to satisfy him -- trust me, I tried! I patted his bottom, held the pacifier in his mouth, spoke soothingly to him... everything but pick him up. I nearly drifted off standing up, so I finally crawled back into bed, seeing that he didn't care what I did if it didn't involve food.
After about half an hour of this 4-month-old version of a temper-trantrum, I moved him to the pack'n'play at the far end of the house. The two boys share a room and I couldn't put Sam through any more of it.
Of course, being picked up and then put back down without a feeding in between was The Last Straw. But he was tired, and after a short flash of temper and about 15 more minutes of gradually quieter grumbling, he settled down and drifted off to sleep.
He woke up at 3:45am, so I staggered out, fed him just a few minutes early, and put him back to sleep in the boys' room.
Saturday night, I wasn't sure what to expect. Imagine the glorious bliss when I woke up to his cries at 6am! The boy catches on fast, praise God! He has slept til at least 4am every night since, everyone is sleeping better without his crying every 2 hours at night, and I actually made it to the gym yesterday.
Third resolution - check
Now I just have to re-acclimate my body to exercise. I walked the track rather than the treadmill yesterday, and even jogged for about 3/4 of a mile. Miraculously, I was actually able to get out of bed this morning. Every muscle from my waist down aches, right down to my toes, but it's a good ache. And after just one workout, I feel a lot better about everything -- my health, my eating (it's weird, but as soon as I start exercising, junk food loses its appeal!), and my ability to take care of the kids... especially Elli. Scott and I realized awhile ago that we have no choice: we MUST stay in shape if we are going to avoid injuring ourselves lifting and transferring Elli.
My dream is to be fit enough to take the kids out for a run on nice days. We bought a jogging stroller for Elli and bikes for Sam and Anna for Christmas (shhhh.... don't tell!). I'll have to have some endurance to keep up with the kids on bikes! I'm really looking forward to getting outside with them, and I think Elli will absolutely LOVE getting out of her wheelchair and racing with her siblings.
First and second resolutions: in process
