Too Old?

I just found a check. It was in a little drawstring bag inside a stationary box that I clearly haven't used much. It was written out to me for $30. Oooo.... I started getting excited. I could get yarn. Or plants. Or material for that quilt I've been wanting to make for Sam.

Oh. I suddenly noted that it was made out to my maiden name. And the memo line said "Merry Christmas!" And it was from my grandma, who stopped sending gifts when I became an "adult."(I put this in quotes because I believe I had just finished high school, and therefore still had QUITE a bit of growing up to do, though I didn't believe so at the time.)

Then I saw it.

The date read "December 14, 1997."

Think it's too late to cash it?

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We got bunk beds this weekend. Sam helped Daddy build it. He must have said "Wow. This is such a cool bed!" a dozen times. It was no problem at all getting him to give the toddler bed to Anna. His toughest decision now is whether to sleep on the top or bottom bunk.

Anna seems to be adjusting to her new sleeping arrangement OK. The first night she spent two hours screaming before she fell asleep. I think she was confused because she was physically able to get out of bed and we kept putting her back IN. Plus the bed was a different place in the room.

Last night she cried for about 20 minutes. Then she woke me up at 5am crying her eyes out. When I walked into the room, I could NOT find her. I was pretty disoriented from being awakened from a deep sleep, but still. She sounded like she was in bed with Sam, but I knew she wasn't quite able to climb up into the bed yet. Then it finally clicked. She was UNDER the bed... in fact, all the way on the other side! I extracted her, got her calmed down and back to sleep, and staggered back to bed. I think she slid off the bed, tried scooting around to find a comfortable position, somehow scooted under the bunk, and then tried to sit up or crawl out. I'm sure that's when the situation became desperate since she wouldn't have known where she was or how to get out. Poor girl.

Tonight she went right down without a fuss, though. Three days of a new thing seems to do the trick with our kids.

Naps have been tricky also, but I think today she wouldn't sleep because she napped in the van while I was running errands. She got just enough to feel rested but not enough to carry her through the evening.

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I have two more knitting projects. And the deadlines are fast approaching. I just got an invitation to a baby shower this Sunday. Looks like a pair of quick-knitting booties are in order!

Then the following Saturday we have another baby shower. I was planning to make a sweater for that one. Not so sure that's going to materialize in time. Maybe I can stall by putting an I.O.U. in a card stating that the sweater will be ready when the baby is born (due date is July 6 or something like that). It worked for the Yarn Harlot.

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I finished Sam's baby book this weekend! I didn't fit the entire first year in it, but that's ok. It's full and now I can move on to faster styles of albums.

I just discovered the Creative Memories Picfolio. In one night, 2 1/2 hours in fact, I got fourteen pages done. That's right. FOURTEEN. Well, I do have to admit -- I didn't write the who/what/where/when/how stuff in yet. But that's the ONLY thing left. I LOVE it. That's the way it's going to have to be in order for me to get these photos safely stored in albums. Unfortunately, I still have to complete Anna's baby book and the one I've started for Elli after her baby book was complete. But once I get those done, it's full steam ahead, baby!

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Two more days til summer vacation. Elli is very excited. I'm still not sure what we're going to do this summer. I had everything all figured up nice and tidy. Then I found out that the plans I had made were based on faulty data. So now I have no idea what to do. I'm usually a decisive person, but this has me completely stymied. I have to decide by Friday.

Basically, it boils down to two things. Do I send Elli to aquatic therapy every other week or not at all? If not at all, I can't do the Bible study I've been attending on Friday mornings but we are more free to do fun things because our aide is working Fridays this summer. But I have to figure out things to do. If every other week, do I really want to attend the Bible study so sporadically? But I'd only have to be creative with activities for us every other Friday.

The other dilemma is, do I spend money on a pool pass for the family when I know full well that I cannot take all three kids all by myself? Will I be able to get the help needed, or go often enough with Scott, to justify the expense? Or should I just invest in another fun backyard water toy and stay cool here at home?

Oh yeah. One more. I want Sam to take swimming lessons so he'll be more independent in the water. But how can I possibly manage that with one child in a wheelchair and enrolled in a two-morning-a-week camp most of the summer (which rules out the every-morning-for-2-weeks lessons), and the other walking enough to be extremely dangerous near water?

I had no idea managing the needs, wants, and schedules of five people could be so complicated. And they aren't even that old. Yet.

Blast from the Past

I have been sorting photos this week in a vain attempt to catch up on all my kids' scrapbooks. That's my summer project, along with finishing the cardigan and probably sewing Sam a twin-sized bedspread of some sort. We're going to graduate him up to a twin bed in the next few months and he's already picked out firetruck fabric at Yarns and Fabrications.

I happened upon two envelopes of photos from my senior year of college. After I caught my breath from laughing so hard, I attempted to photograph the photos with my digital camera. They aren't the greatest quality, but I thought everyone would enjoy these flashback photos.

Scott and I get all gussied up for the Junior-Senior Banquet. I am wearing a bridesmaids dress my mom wore for my aunt's wedding something like fifteen years earlier. Scott flew back from New York City to be my date to this dinner.

I love this photo. Nice napkins, ladies! Brenda and Brooke allowed us to share their table.

I have no idea what we're doing here. But this is Brooke and I carrying on at the banquet. (We had to generate our own entertainment because what was planned was so... well... lame. You know it's bad when the (then popular) Christian music group (who shall remain nameless) tells the audience, "We know you're not allowed to dance... but go ahead anyway.")

Busy busy busy

I got over the weird unsettled stomach by Thursday evening, for the most part. I drank some Pepto Bismol before we hit the road Friday evening for my in-laws because I was feeling motion-sick all afternoon. Perhaps I haven't been eating enough, though it's tough when you feel nauseous. Anyway, I shared a Chick-fil-a meal with Scott and that really seemed to help.

Thursday was a long day at Children's -- I ran my second meeting after working all afternoon on last-minute changes to my presentation. I presented my idea for the council's big project of the year that night. It was well-received, but I have to do some more ground work before I can really launch into it. I don't beat around the bush with things, but to be successful in an organization like this, I guess I have to do some of that politicking. It was amusing to me -- I was calling for volunteers to form teams to get cracking on my plan when one of the VPs on the council yanked back on the reins a bit. He wanted me to hook up with various people to facilitate this stuff. Should be interesting to see how much this slows up the process. Fortunately, I felt progressively better as the day went along, so I was up to doing the whole meeting thing.

Friday was a busy day of laundry, packing, prepping music for church on Sunday, and working. We had a good weekend. The kids played hard all day and the older two discovered how much they like trampolines. Fortunately our yard isn't big enough or level enough for one.

Today I've been procrastinating on housework. I had a bunch of phone calls to make, following up on transferring our homeowners and auto insurance to new companies, working on the follow-up from last week's meeting at work, and updating our financial stuff for the month. I should be doing laundry and dishes, but that's tough to do with kids running around getting into it with each other. I prefer doing tasks like that when they are asleep or supervised by someone else.

I made some major progress on the cardigan for my niece. I'm ready to start shaping the arm holes on the arms. This is very exciting -- the rows are now getting shorter, though I still have 28 more before I start shaping the neck. It's the sweater back that never ends! And this is the smallest size you can make! I've decided that making short sleeves would defeat the purpose of a cardigan, but I'm going to simplify the pattern so I can finish them faster. I love cables, but they really slow me down and I'm afraid this sweater won't fit if I don't finish it soon! I'll post a photo when I finish the back -- nothing really new to show at this point.

Bleh

I feel yucky today. It actually started last night, but I thought my stomach was off because I didn't eat normally for me.

Scott and I went to lunch at a cute little French bistro yesterday. The food was super-yummy, we shared a scrumptious chocolate pudding dessert (called "pot de creme" -- pronounced "poe du crem"), and I thoroughly savored the chance to have him all to myself for 2 hours.

I was quite full the rest of the day, so I didn't do anything big for dinner last night. I gave the kids grilled cheese and Scott and I had bowls of granola after we got them to bed. I also have some sliced strawberries with whipped topping.

I felt a bit weird going to bed last night, and even worse this morning. I'm wiped out and when I tried eating some yogurt, that just prompted vicious stomach aches and cramping. My body is purging at the moment, and every time I eat or drink anything, that sets off 30-60 minutes of aches and cramps.

I can't decide if I ate something bad yesterday -- perhaps the sauce with the pork in my lunch or the whipped topping of unknown age with the strawberries? Or do I have some stomach virus that's going to sweep through the family and flatten everyone over the next 24-48 hours? That would really stink since I have a council meeting to run tomorrow evening, at which I'm also presenting a proposal for our 2006 goal.

And why is it that children are irresistably drawn to adults laying down? It's like I'm a magnet for rough-housing and elbows to the gut today.

Bleh.

I Couldn't Resist

I bought a knitting book today. I tried to buy it at my local yarn store, but they didn't have it. So I ordered One Skein: 30 Quick Projects to Knit and Crochet tonight. I saw it on Saturday while at sock club and loved the concept of projects only needing one ball of yarn. I'm hoping to make a bunch of items for Christmas this year. I know, I know... Christmas is a long way off. But I have coworkers now, and even with a job, the gift budget will only go so far. If I can knit from my leftover yarn, that will help a lot! (See how easily I justify a book purchase?)

In other news, I bought yarn to make a project from that book. Before I even ordered the book. Even though it's supposed to be for yarn I already have. Hey - the yarn was on sale. And I had to buy some for a baby shower gift coming up. And the yarn for the book project was free after buying the two balls for the baby gift.

(Do I sound guilty? Like I'm making excuses? It's that obvious?)

Buy Stock in Bandaids

Sam has discovered the stash of Veggie Tales bandages in our medicine cabinet. Now every time he gets a "boo-boo" he tearfully announces, "I need a bandaid. That would make this all better. I want the Bob and Larry ones."

So far we have bandaged a bump on his back, a pinched fingernail, and a stubbed toe. Nothing was actually bleeding.

Perhaps I should just get some plain ones and head this off at the pass?

If It Was a Snake

it would have bit me.


This is the computer desk I blog at. Sam kept asking me to get this thing out of the hole in the side yesterday. I thought some smartie-pants-guest from the weekend (you know I love you all!) had stuck a thumb tack there and I didn't want to mess with it when the kids were awake -- sharp pointy object and all.

Finally this morning, Sam had pestered me enough. I pulled it out and wah-lah. My size 6 needle.

Missing: One Size 6 Needle

I have heard some nasty rumors around the Internet about the pattern I'm using for my birthday socks (scroll to the bottom for a photo). I even witnessed a knitting pro Brooke get beaten by this sock and have to frog it.

Despite the naysayers and bad experiences, I listened to Brooke's ever-optimistic advice and started the pattern anyway. I have been knitting away without a care in the world, reaching the heel flap last week. Thursday and Friday I turned the heel and began the heel gussets.

Suddenly the thought struck like a bolt of lightning.

"These socks aren't very stretchy and lots of people have trouble getting them fit right. Even Brooke. Maybe I should try it on to make sure."

So I did.

All seemed great as I gently pulled the sock over my toes and towards my heel. Ahhh... it went over the heel! My pulse quickened as I imagined wearing my own hand-knit socks in just a few short days. Until the last few rows of the leg got stuck going over my heel.

Those were the rows I knit while at the Yarn Harlot's book tour. The excitement must have caused me to pull the yarn tighter than normal.

So I took the sock to Brooke's sock club Saturday morning. Sam tagged along (and reminded me again of how much he loves the red and black fire-truck fabric - I think I will have to create something for him out of that for his birthday) to see "our friend Brooke." (Used to be that he called her "your friend" -- congrats on the promotion, Brooke!)

She agreed that if I actually wanted to wear these socks myself, I needed to frog it and re-knit the leg looser. Sam enjoyed pulling the yarn -- I just hope he knows not to do that unless I've told him to! Then Brooke spent a good 15 minutes fixing my poor attempt at picking the stitches back up. Thanks - you rock!

I've reknit the leg and am working on the heel flap again. I realized just tonight that I had also botched the heel flap the first time through -- I knit 15 rows instead of 15 pairs of rows. No wonder that heel seemed so short!

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I've made more progress on the baby cardigan. This is the back, and is almost one entire repeat. I'm not sure when I'll get back to it though -- one of the kids has run off with a needle. I found my stitch counter under the couch, but removing all the cushions and pulling the couch away from the wall did not reveal the needle's hiding place.

If anyone has any clues as the whereabouts of my size 6 needle, please call 1-800-LostNeedle. You won't be asked to give your name and you may receive cash for your clues.

Happy Mother's Day

I had a great day. The older two kids made me cards, and Sam was so excited for me to open mine that he brought it to me as soon as I woke up on Mother's Day! Elli wrote a note, using her Dynavox to tell her teacher what she wanted to say. She said loves having tea parties with me and reading books, and her favorite thing to do with me is watch movies.

My writer husband brought me flowers and wrote a card that made me cry. I'll save it forever -- it's one of those to read on bad days when you need a pick-me-up.

Happy Mother's Day to all of you!

Plants and Pot Lids

Ahhh... digging in the dirt... a little boy's paradise.

You say "noise;" Anna says "music."

Getting the Garden In

The last couple days I've spent as much time outside with the kids as possible. The weather has been amazing and we've played hard, dug up worms, planted flowers, swung to the skies, and prepped the vegetable garden. Our neighbor inherited a tiller and saved me hours of back-breaking work last night by tilling a bale of peat moss and four large bags of composted manure into the my garden plot. The robins love me now -- they are now feasting on 100 square feet of lucious earthworms and creepy-crawlers brought forth by all the earth-moving.

This morning, as soon as we got breakfast eaten, I took all three kids out back and we planted the veggies. Anna mostly crawled around and took dirt samples from the various pots and hills laying around the yard. Then she poked the garden with my weeder for awhile, enjoying imitating her mom.

Sam and Elli took turns plopping yellow squash and zuccini and cauliflower seeds into the dirt and smoothing it over the top. They also had a lot of fun with the hose, watering them in. Then Sam got distracted by the vast quantity of worms we were finding, so I had to reel him in to plant the tomatoes. Heather acted as his earthworm babysitter, holding each worm for him while he carefully set the plants into the holes I dug. Elli had a difficult time getting comfortable in the dirt, but she did seem to enjoy being included. Getting her wheelchair out in the grass is a bit challenging and its alignment now seems to be scewed. Small price to pay to get her out of the house and enjoying the Great Outdoors.

I still need to plant some pest-controlling flowers around the veggies and some more lettuce, then mulch the whole thing. Elli picked out some flowers to plant in the shade, which we still need to do. But the bulk of the work is done.

Correction.

The bulk of the spring work is done. Now I have to keep up with the weeding, pruning back, staking, and harvesting.

P.S. I have photos, but first I have to figure out how to download them to my computer!

Great Saturday

Much as they bicker over toys, these two are great buddies. Here they are both waking up with a juice and a video after a busy day of playing outside and a nice long afternoon nap. What a life!

I took the girls to a women's banquet Saturday. Elli decided she wanted to wear matching dresses with Anna, so I dressed to coordinate. They really enjoyed themselves, though we did have to leave early when Anna got too tired to be entertained any longer.

I got myself a new toy with my first paycheck. I've wanted a digital camera of my own for a few years now, so when my film camera died last year, I started looking seriously at them. I just fell in love with these miniature cameras. It's as small as a deck of cards, and just a tad thicker -- that's a CD next to it. Isn't it the cutest little camera you've ever seen?

Knitting With Babies

You read that right. I actually did it. I brought my Jaywalker sock today while watching 4 children aged 13 months and younger.

I may just be crazy. Size 1 knitting needles with two children who just learned to walk and therefore stagger and fall constantly... (the other two were 6 months old and not very impressed by the shiny metalic sticks).

The day went rather well, considering who I was dealing with. One child has been getting eye teeth and has never really enjoyed being separated from her mother. But today she managed to only cry every 5-10 minutes and settled down whenever I picked her up. The other child is mine and she only had a couple episodes of "But that's MY mommy" jealousy. These two entertained themselves for a good 40 minutes eating Cheerios from tiny cups, dumping them on the floor, and then eating them off the floor. Who knew that you could attain nirvana from a cupful of little o-shaped edibles?

The little babies had their moments, but I was so proud of myself for getting the one into a quiet bed before he was too upset to sleep. He stayed contently in there as long as his music-maker played the right song. I think he was overwhelmed by the lights and noise - he is the first child in his family and is completely unused to all the action!

The yarn and the crinkly bag I packed the sock in were very interesting to the girls. My daughter took off with my pattern, which made knitting the heel flap slow going. The other girl sat on my lap and enjoyed fingering the yarn and needles... and I was pleasantly surprised that she didn't pull a needle out! I didn't knit much -- despite the utopian society we established, I still had to stop every several stitches to roll someone over, pick someone up, or rescue a baby from being rocked out of his punkin seat.

I am now ready to turn the heel. Perhaps tonight I'll get that done and start on the foot of the sock.

What's that you say? My niece is already 6 months? The sweater I'm supposedly knitting for her is sized for 6 months? I've only got two fronts done and 2 inches of the back? Louder please. I can't hear you!

I. Can't. Sleep.

It's 1:30am and I've been tossing and turning for 2 1/2 hours. I don't think I've fallen asleep yet, but if I did, it was a really restless, fitful sleep.

Then, about 10 minutes ago, Elli woke up and I could tell she needed something. I went in and told her that it was still the middle of the night and she needed to go back to sleep. Her whiny response told me she wanted/needed something.

Quick inventory: Is it too hot or cold in here? Mmm... not really. Is she dirty? Nope - that all got taken care of earlier today. Is she thirsty? Hmmm... dinner was hamburgers and fries, which was rather salty. I'm thirsty, as a matter of fact.

"Elli, are you thirsty?"

Instant facial and bodily response in the affirmative. Wow! That was easy!

As I headed to the kitchen to find her (and me) a drink, I marveled for the dozenth time this week at her amazing ability to communicate without words.

Scott watched the kids today while I worked at Children's. (That went very well, by the way. Both of us had a good day.) When I got home, he told me how amazed he was at how fast Elli has gotten with her Dynavox.

He said this afternoon while he was sweeping the floor he called over his shoulder, "Elli? Are you hungry?" Not more than 6 seconds later, she said, "Hamburger!" Another time, he asked her which video she wanted to watch and stood amazed as she navigated quickly to her video page to tell him. While he made dinner, he put a music CD in without asking her first. She vocalized her disapproval, and when he finally gave in and asked what she wanted to hear, she went straight to the page and asked for her favorite: "Great Praise Songs for Kids."

As he put it, "She's so in tune with that device that it's second nature now." The girl knows what she wants and finally has a way to tell us.

I cannot express to you how much this has improved her outlook on life, and our ability to relate and interact with her. She is MUCH less frustrated with us, and we are much more aware of what she really understands. I've always tried to talk to her like I would anyone else, but I never knew for sure if she really understood me until the last six to nine months. Her mastery of the Dynavox now gives us objective proof that she not only comprehends what we say to her, but that she is really quite smart and aware of everything that is going on.

The latest thing I've added to her device are some new reasons why she might be upset, like "Sam is in trouble and I don't like that," "Anna is crying. It's OK, Anna," "yummy," and "yucky." She LOVES these new things, particularly being able to tell Anna that it's OK. Elli is ultra-sensitive to people's emotions and to be able to express comfort to someone who is upset really seems to help her remain calm herself.

----

I think my sleeplessness comes from two things:

- Diet Coke consumed at 5-something this evening

- A crazy work day

I should have known better than to have so much caffeine so late in the day. I was pretty sleepy and thought that it would help me stay awake to watch "Survivor" with Scott and actually be decent company tonight. It certainly did that. Unfortunately, its effects have lasted much longer. Caffeine has always had the effect of keeping my mind racing even while my body is tired.

The crazy work day has given my brain plenty of fodder to race with. I get to interview two candidates for the position of being my partner as Parent Coordinator of the Family Advisory Council. My boss and office partner did the first round of interviews and narrowed the field to two. My office partner strongly suggested that I be allowed to interview them as well, since I'll be working so closely with them. She also suggested this because she didn't prefer with the candidate my boss was leaning towards. So despite my boss's reluctance to share her personal reservations with one candidate so as not to bias me before I even meet them, my office partner spent a good 45 minutes describing them both and explaining why our boss doesn't necessarily choose people for the best reasons. She thinks I might be better off trying to do the job all by myself, if there's any way I can squeeze in some more hours. It was quite an information overload, especially since just yesterday I had a long conversation with the woman who had this job before me and was encouraged to find a person to share the job with!

I also got to learn all the not-so-great characteristics of my boss today. This is good information to have, I guess (knowing that she has mood swings related to some strong medications and that she's very forgetful helps me do my job better - I know that I need to save everything from her so I can fill in the memory gaps and that a grumpy moment won't last so come back later), but these conversations are so difficult to navigate without sliding into gossip. I'm really not sure I handled it well today.

All this office conversation also showed me why I am so much more productive at home, even with children in the mix. In the office, you have to be social with your coworkers. So two hours at home, at least if the kids are in bed, is much more productive work time than 2 hours in the office.

At this point, at 2am, I'm thinking that I can't decide about the whole job-share thing until I've interviewed the two candidates myself and until we've had a few more weeks of trial-runs here at the house. The kids are always amazing for their dad, so I need to allow some time for the novelty to wear off before I'll know what my options are. If I can leave earlier in the day and get more hours in on Thursdays, it might work.

My boss really wants me to spend at least half my time in the office, and now that I've been in the position for a couple weeks, I think she's right. A lot of things need to be dealt with in person - one-on-one meetings and the like. Part of me, the type-A control-freak part, wants to do the job all by myself so I can do it my way. But part of me, the reasonable mother who knows that sick happens and I owe my family the best part of me, thinks that sharing the job is the wise thing to do. That way I've got a built-in backup plan, which will significantly reduce stress when I need a backup plan!

OK. I really MUST get some sleep. It's been 9 hours. Surely the caffeine has worn off by now. And typing all the wild thoughts tumbling around my head has tamed the wildness quite a bit. Maybe I can finally rest now!

Or not. Elli is still awake and commenting from her bed. I canNOT sleep when one of the kids is making noise, no matter how pleasant those noises may be. Drat drat drat...

Milestones, Mulch, and Big Moments

Walking Independently!

Check her out! This afternoon, as I was working on the computer, I suddenly realized it was very quite. Too quite. I immediately set out to find Anna, afraid I'd find her eating cat food or worse.

I came around the corner into the kitchen and found her walking towards me... without her push toy! She had that little pink puppy in one hand and was taking little shuffly steps, but she walked all the way across the kitchen to me, and then made a grand tour of the house, solo.

I'm thrilled. She has been getting awfully heavy to carry.

The downside? No more smacking hands on the floor providing constant echo-location.

Mmmmm.... Mulch!

Nice goatee, Anna! She continues on her mission to taste-test all the potting soil, dirt, and mulch around the house.

My Big Moment

This photo was taken by Stephanie Pearl-McPhee at the book fair and speaking engagement we attended in Lexington. That's me, Brooke, and Kimmey right in the front row! Congrats to Brooke, by the way, on her mention in this entry on Stephanie's blog (you'll find her about 3/4 the way down).

How To Be a Drama Queen

Step 1: Burst into tears when Mommy puts you down (even if you were squirming to get down -- that's totally beside the point).
Step 2: Turn on the mucus river from your nose and mouth for added pathetic effect.
Step 3: Crawl to the couch and lean on the couch, sobbing.
Step 4: Slowly slide down the couch with each sob and gasp until you are prostrate on the floor. (See Figure 1)

Figure 1

Step 5: Create as huge a puddle as possible with the tears and snot streaming from your face while getting as flat as possible. Pretend to ignore the chuckling your audience is failing to restrain.
Step 6: While still sobbing and streaming, peak at your audience to gauge your effectiveness. (See Figure 2)

Figure 2

Step 7: Pretend to be inconsollable as you calculate any necessary adjustments to your performance.
Step 8: Sit up and display the red puffy eyes, snotty nose, and tear-filled face you've worked so hard to create. This should clinch your triumph, but try to conceal your smile as you crawl into the waiting arms of the hopefully-now-penitent and duly-sympathetic audience. (See Figure 3)

Figure 3